What did I do to overcome depression?

Since my mum passed away, the years have been a lot harder and dragging. My depression was getting out of control, lost so much weight, lost appetite, isolated myself, stayed alone because I would prefer my own company(I still do). I would start to feel better one week and then—BOOM, it was back. I felt like I couldn’t escape it, as much as I tried to. I’ve been in and out of depression… I’d struggle for a few months and then be good for a few months. I continued that cycle for a long time –11 years.! But 2017/18 were the hardest years, The depression just wouldn’t go away. All type of mental health related illnesses are effecting the same area in your brain.

I ended up resigning from a very good job, I started business which I failed badly because I couldn’t understand the people I was working with were fraud. Depression wasn’t there every single day, but it was there for the majority of the time. And let me tell you, long term depression can make you think as if that’s what your life is, and you will question yourself “Is this just who I am?”. Many us think we don’t know someone with mental health issues, but that’s not true because almost 1 in 4 people we meet on daily basis is suffering from depression. Mental health is highly stigmatised and seen as a disgrace by society and that’s the reason why many sufferers will not speak or admit and that prevents them from seeking professional help. Society is full of judgemental people who I believe also going through some mental health condition.

I do want give some credit to my manager from a previous job who called me into his office and asked me what is wrong, you come to office but you don’t seem to be mentally present? that’s it! that’s what I probably needed somebody to ask me and I started talking and explained what was happening. At that particular time I was dealing with some bank issues. So I was victim of some sort of fraud, my bank accounts were blocked, It took me 1 year to clear myself from this after multiple meetings, calls and applications and even a ‘hand written’ letter, which explained how all this had effected my mental health, my personal life. I had requested the bank to remove the bar so I could at least have a bank account. The positive in this was the bank acknowledged that it wasn’t my fault but because of the strict rules they had to investigate.

I never shared this with anyone for a long time and probably some ‘close ones’ will be reading this here. Simply because of the judgements and the lectures and blame games, that wouldn’t have benefitted me in anyway. The problem is when we see somebody suffering physically we will run towards them and help but unfortunately we don’t do this for some who is emotionally distressed.

1. Taken a break

There comes a time when you have to choose your mental health over anything else. Because you need to be YOU in order to do anything else. If you are not happy how are you going to make anyone around you happy. So resigning from the job was important because I couldn’t understand and perform my duties. It wasn’t easy to survive without income but  I’m so glad I did. Being able to set some boundaries for yourself is important. Money will always come and go, and I knew it will come back.

2. Changes in my diet

Basically, I’ve cut out a ton of things from my diet which caused a lot of weigh loss, its almost everything but mainly all the junk. With the goal of cleaning out my gut I ate more healthy., however I still junk once in a while. More physical activity, regular gym. Now I wasn’t probably eating enough to give myself the energy required for me to function. I still cannot eat early mornings ‘breakfast’.

3. Spending time with people who make me happy.

This is probably the first thing we should do. Our surroundings have a huge impact on our moods, behaviours. One of the best ways to find happiness is to find those who know how to nurture and create their own happiness. Spend time around these people and you’ll find yourself seeing the world differently. We all know life can be hard, we all have our struggles. But it is refreshing to spend time with people who don’t waste time and energy in comparing situations. You can almost feel your spirits lifting around someone who is willing to see the good in things.

4. Moved out

Yes, I found a lot of peace in being alone, away from all the negativity that was surrounding me. I moved out, bought my own house, decorated it how I wanted. A lot of people were against it, saying that “I would be out and about” and doing things and nobody would be there to watch me, LOL! Do we really need someone to watch us? Can that ever stop people from doing things they want to do? NO! If I don’t want to do certain things nothing can make me and if I want to do something nothing can stop me SO for people who think they can control someones actions, or guard someone 24/7, you are wrong! Thats just society for you!